I’ve been trying really hard to let go of the past. I’ve done a great job thus far. There are times where I am reminded of her…where her name may come up…and all those feelings resurface.
It’s not so much about the anger or the hate anymore…I struggle with the “what ifs”. Her role in my partners life…has caused me to make adjustments to mine…our life together. I do know that there is nothing that we cannot over come. We are a team, and I am true to my commitment. I love her more than I have loved anyone.
It is the woman before me that haunts me sometimes. Thank God it’s not like before, but her memory does haunt.
So much happened in such a small time frame…so many life altering things…and I wonder if karma has played her role yet. When I think of her now, it’s not with spite…it’s not with anger. I have accepted that what has happened cannot be changed…and that I must and CAN live with the outcome. Everything happens for a reason…and perhaps this other woman is the reason I am with my partner…
No, when I think of her now…I wonder if she has learned her lessons. I wonder if all the turmoil she caused has taught her anything. I wonder if she learned anything being alone in her skin…and I wonder if it affects her that she has altered someone’s life so profoundly…from one mistake.
Life is about learning lessons…and for some reason I truly hope she learned hers…because the mistakes she made in the past are just not worth repeating.
Everyone deserves to be happy…even her. I’ll give her that.
I wish her well. I never thought I would…but I do.
